About Sedna’s Daughters

Welcome! Sedna’s Daughters is a virtual home for women who have been shunned by their biological and/or adoptive families. This site provides resources to help daughters understand family and cultural dynamics, engage in an international conversation about their experiences, and find the support they need to heal, regardless of where they are in their healing process or why we were shunned.

Regardless of your biological family’s religious beliefs, race, country of origin, or social class, all families in the world shun daughters for the same reason: we would not follow the spoken or unspoken family rules. We are shunned because we would not comply or submit to the family’s expectations that we maintain our assigned role in their system. This “system” is most often an unconscious, unspoken set of rules created by the cultures where the families live. These cultural rules may be invisible and unconsciously acted out by family members, but they have very real, everyday consequences to daughters. Often the family rules are severely enforced.

Some of the reasons daughters are shunned include:

Refusing to be the family slave

Pregnancy before marriage

Not complying to religious rules

Marrying a person of another race or religion

Disclosing incest or childhood molestation/rape by a family member

Gender identity or sexual orientation

Rejecting the family’s religion or political beliefs

Getting an education

Speaking out about favoritism of a sibling

Refusing to comply with arranged marriages….and many more.

Daughters are often scapegoated (irrationally blamed for all a family’s problems), and this scapegoating is used to justify the shunning. But when it comes to families–human groups that are supposed to be based in unconditional love and solace for all its members–there is NO justification for shunning. The purpose of a family is to LOVE its members. Where there is no love, there is no family.

Families who shun their daughters have failed their daughters.

It is up to us, the daughters who survived betrayal and irrational slander by people who were supposed to love and respect us, to reclaim and heal our lives–for ourselves, our ancestors, our children, and other daughters who need our support around the world. We are many, and together, we can heal ourselves and promulgate an international dialogue about Family Violence Against Women–to stop it!

9 thoughts on “About Sedna’s Daughters

  1. What a beautiful feeling it is to find this site. I have been struggling to find a place to belong for such a long time. My family cut me off in 2013, but I have been rather confused about it.

    • Dear Rebecca:
      Thank you for your courage in leaving a comment and sharing your experience. Family estrangement/shunning IS a confusing, complicated, and painful experience, but understanding YOUR experience of it is what matters–not trying to understand them–which is nearly impossible to do.

      Perhaps some of the resources listed on this site will be helpful to you. Please know that I am honoring the difficulty of your experiences and know, from my own life, that you CAN heal. Even this pain can pass….you are not alone but traveling with many, many sisters who sincerely care and believe in you.

      With an abiding belief in your right to be happy and loved,

  2. Hi…
    You are like an Angel in the dark!
    I have been shunned literally all my life, since I was a very small being… It took me a long time to understand everything, but I have always been so alone on my path… Only now, 47 years later had I just realized just how deep I have been betrayed by my own family, and all my work I had done throughout my life came crushing in on me once more…I had fallen 777 times already, and I did not know if I had the strength to get up one more time alone in the dark… So, I cried out for my real family, my spiritual family throughout space and time, and then today I picked up a copy of Sage Women, for no other reason than to use the cover for my next collage/ vision board to help me heal once more, as I did not expect an response, since I have cried out a lot, but rarely got an answer or the connection I been hoping for, yearning for — praying for… This miracle, this blessing I found reading your words, and I thank you from my heart, for this renews my strength one more time!!! :)))))))
    And I have just begun reading here…
    Be blessed my Sister, be blessed!

    • I am so glad my humble offerings to those who also have been shunned have meant something important to you and came to you at just the right moment! I believe deeply in the pure benevolence of our Divine Universe. Thank you for re-affirming that for me, Blessed Sister! Keep Going! This world needs YOU! –Sedna

  3. Your words are so encouraging and sympathise with every word it’s a terrible pain you feel when your shunned and you have no family to help with the hurt

  4. To be shunned by family is a feeling beyond explanation & very hard to recover from . Reminders of this rejection continue to haunt the rejected child for a lifetime, the shock remain s that a family could actu ally reject a child that needed & had so much love for them. The incomprehemsion of how a family could do this, that it is infact true and for no just cause but their own denial of truth & or ignorance of what real love is. The loss of roots, even childhood photo s not available, to know that even in their families passing their death notices will only be known by chance. To know that in own times of sickness there will be no family care or support forthcoming. The rejected child makes a huge change in her family line. The rejected child has the courage the intelligence to survive this treatment. At times only just. Humanity needs our strength & our wisdom as together we are realigning future generations away from ignorance, denial & abuse to awareness & unconditional love. Closer to the heaven on earth that is possible. We have an important purpose.

    • Thank you for speaking up so hopefully about the future, Maria, and rejected daughters’ ability to bring healing to ourselves and this world through our awareness-raising and advocacy for other daughters who have been shunned by their biological relatives! XO, Sedna

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